Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
