I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
