if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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