can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
