I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
