I would go down on you faster than GM stock
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
