I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
