dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
