I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
sarcasm needs its own font
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
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