I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
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