McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
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