it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
