Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize