So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Randomize
