it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
She's the barista slut.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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