I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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