yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
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