i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Randomize