My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize
