I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
