Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
