Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
