I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
