ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
We need a shit load of segways right now
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
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