i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
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