would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
