My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
he shaved USA in his pubs
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize