You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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