so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize
