I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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