I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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