we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
don't judge my taste in strippers
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
