Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
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