The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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