What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
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