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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  Writing my paper on freud at bar

  (917): View more from New York City

  ??

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children

  (917): View more from New York City

  Smooth

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• (478): View more from Georgia

  I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?

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• (504): View more from Louisiana

  lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.

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• (720): View more from Colorado

  I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN

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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...

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