Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity http://tfl.nu/hbyg
  Replies (7) Good night (1487) Bad night (1777)
• Favorite

  (606): View more from Kentucky

  the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (606): the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night http://tfl.nu/1i7p
  Replies (4) Good night (2030) Bad night (681)
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (972): He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up http://tfl.nu/uv7z
  Replies (6) Good night (3361) Bad night (840)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven. http://tfl.nu/xlkq
  Replies (9) Good night (6347) Bad night (1043)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.

  (1-651): View more from Minnesota

  called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot. (1-651): called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck. http://tfl.nu/1omb
  Replies (18) Good night (6079) Bad night (1552)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing. http://tfl.nu/i0xb
  Replies (5) Good night (2988) Bad night (823)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house. http://tfl.nu/lo56
  Replies (8) Good night (1991) Bad night (1148)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer http://tfl.nu/j23z
  Replies (15) Good night (1511) Bad night (2172)
• Favorite

  (807): View more from Ontario

  Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (807): Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath http://tfl.nu/x0dh
  Replies (7) Good night (2621) Bad night (558)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  they sound like some classy girls.

  (1-630): View more from Illinois

  Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (630): they sound like some classy girls. (1-630): Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting. http://tfl.nu/azgf
  Replies (4) Good night (2013) Bad night (559)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it http://tfl.nu/hn11
  Replies (6) Good night (1129) Bad night (634)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it. http://tfl.nu/sqkc
  Replies (2) Good night (765) Bad night (224)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (208): I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea. http://tfl.nu/ctp9
  Replies (2) Good night (496) Bad night (279)
• Favorite

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (901): So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity. http://tfl.nu/0b51
  Replies (5) Good night (968) Bad night (178)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch http://tfl.nu/1u6j
  Replies (0) Good night (385) Bad night (187)

Randomize