Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
