I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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