I'm laying in your front yard are you home
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
