that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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