I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
