thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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