you would pick up someone in the library
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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