your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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