so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
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