you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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