and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
