shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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