Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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